SINGAPORE – Things to Know

IT

 – Dear friends,

in November I spent about two weeks in Singapore.

If you are wondering if I went there to see that friend of mine who left just when we started dating (and enjoying it), yes. The answer is yes.

If your gossip urges make you ask if he is now my boyfriend, no. The answer is no. Singapore is 10,000 kilometers from Italy. Not 500. No 1000. TEN THOUSAND. Even the most reckless lover, would give up.

This is the premise.

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Now, I have been two weeks in Singapore but, if you have not an impossible and masochistic love to feed, you have no reason to stay so long. Go there, stop by 2-3 days, even 4, and then continue for any other more popular / exotic / natural Asia destination. You will have Malaysia right opposite of you. Thailand in 1 hour flight, Indonesia in 2 hours. What should I add?

However, I will tell you about the places I’ve been BUT FIRST, before loosing yourselves for Singaporean streets, you must be aware of the fact that Singapore is very clean, very efficient, punctual, very expensive, very safe (the type that you could walk around naked, covered with Apple devices, and no one will bother you) and for all these noble reasons is considered the Switzerland of the East.

This is not random, because it is a dictatorship-like. There are many things that are prohibited. Some predictable, like owning cannabinoids, as with us (except that there is death penalty there, in the case). Some curious, that I state now, before entering into the details of what to see, where to eat or where to drink in Singapore.

The penalty, depending on the offense, is between a huge fine of hundreds – if not thousands – of dollars … and DEATH. There are also corporal punishment, beatings in this case, which are awarded publicly and that are standardized by law.

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1. It is forbidden to eat or drink on public transport. So if, like me, always carry a bottle of water, be careful, be very careful: a little distraction, and you’re fucked up.

2. It is of course forbidden to throw anything on the ground, from the candy paper to the cigarette ash.

3. About cigarettes, smoking is prohibited EVERYWHERE, except in small areas devoted to drug addiction. But this I have already said.

4. If you plan to bring the e-cig with you, WRONG. Introduce one of those in Singapore seems to get serious as bringing with you a Kalashnikov.

5. Chewing gums are strictly prohibited! They don’t sell them, if you look for them, won’t find. You can bring up to one or two packs. At your own risk! (Vigorsol Air Action is actually the new heroin)

6. It is forbidden to spit on the ground and we are very pleased, given that we all agree on how loathsome that habit is. If by chance you are so much drunk to throw up in the street (and this means that you are probably a millionaire, because drinking in Singapore is not for the poor) you will likely die or be imprisoned for the rest of your days.

7. It is forbidden NOT to flush. This also seems incontrovertible.

8. It is forbidden to collect the flowers from the gardens / flower beds. Just as it is forbidden to deface public walls (no graffiti)

9. It is forbidden to take the dogs for a walk. I have not seen one. And no, come on, do not say they eat them cause I don’t want to think about.

10. I think also begging is banned. No poor people in Singapore.  At most they can sell paper tissues. This is because often in places where you eat, there are no napkins. So if you don’t have them with you, you have to buy from the only unfortunate people that you see around. Just begging, however, is unacceptable.

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Apart from that, Singapore is a strange mixture, in which the Asian identity – although very present – merges with the most explicit Westernism, where you breathe the purest capitalism, the efficiency, the unconditional will of progress; in which the highest skyscrapers are close to residential neighborhoods, huge shopping centers and popular food courts;  and the architecture, vertical and dense, is so close to the jungle.

Now, you can definitely land in Singapore.

Write you soon,

s.

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3 thoughts on “SINGAPORE – Things to Know

  1. Pingback: SINGAPORE – Cose da Sapere | Un giorno sarò una Travel Blogger

  2. Erm, you can smoke in most open air places, as long as it’s not near a building entrance or in a park. Each morning and evening, tens of thousands of people also bring their dogs out for a walk. But they tend to do it at parks or residential areas. Not the shopping and biz districts.

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    • I actually saw in the most open areas the smoking ban signal. Even on rooftops, or outside cocktail bar. No problem with that, unless at first you need to get used at it. Regarding dogs, I stayed close to biz district but lots of people use to live there anyway. And even when I went to the park, I didn’t see one dog. It has to be just a case 🙂 – Actually, you made me think that I forgot to mention bans about pornography, or about homosexuality, or about oral sex (now allowed only for heterosexual people)…

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